I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: An Interview.

The action icon is universally recognized as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, in the midst of his star power in the eighties and nineties, he also headlined several genuinely hilarious comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its 35-year mark this December.

The Role and That Line

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger plays a hardened detective who goes undercover as a elementary educator to catch a killer. For much of the story, the procedural element serves as a simple backdrop for Arnold to have charming moments with his young class. Arguably the most famous features a little boy named Joseph, who spontaneously stands up and states the stoic star, “It's boys who have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” Arnold responds dryly, “I appreciate the insight.”

The boy behind the line was portrayed by former young actor Miko Hughes. His career featured a notable part on Full House playing the antagonist to the child stars and the pivotal role of the resurrected boy in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with several projects listed on his IMDb. He also engages with fans at popular culture events. He recently discussed his memories from the set of Kindergarten Cop 35 years later.

Memories from the Set

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I have no memory from being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're snapshots. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would take me to auditions. Sometimes it was like a cattle call. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all patiently queue, enter the casting office, be in there for a very short time, read a small part they wanted and that's all. My parents would feed me the lines and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was very kind. He was playful. He was nice, which I suppose makes sense. It'd be weird if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a good work environment. He was great to work with.

“It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a big action star because my family informed me, but I had never really seen his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he wasn't scary to me. He was merely entertaining and I was eager to interact with him when he was available. He was busy, obviously, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd tense up and we'd be holding on. He was exceptionally kind. He purchased for each child in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was the hottest tech. That was the must-have gadget, that funky old yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It finally gave out. I also was given a real silver whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your days on set as being enjoyable?

You know, it's interesting, that movie became a phenomenon. It was such a big movie, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the direction of Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was just released. That was the coolest toy, and I was proficient. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would bring me their Game Boys to beat difficult stages on games because I was able to, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all little kid memories.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the infamous quote, do you remember the context? Did you grasp the meaning?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word taboo meant, but I understood it was edgy and it got a big laugh. I understood it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given special permission in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it was conceived, based on what I was told, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Certain bits of dialogue were established early on, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it wasn't pure improvisation, but they refined it on set and, I suppose the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Let me think about it, I need time" and took a short while. She deliberated carefully. She said she had doubts, but she felt it would likely become one of the iconic quotes from the movie and her instinct was correct.